I’ve been teaching since 1995 and I’ve been a preschool owner since 2003.
If theres something I consistently see every year, it’s that of Sepanx or Separation Anxiety.
Think of your young child. What has he known? ONLY your breast, your loving care, your temper, your humor, your form (or lack of) self discipline, your form (or lack of) discipline tactics, your routine (or lack of routine).
THEN you change all of this and try to/leave him behind in an atmosphere so different—not necessarily bad but just vastly different because this new place has lots of new toys, sounds, colors, people, schedules, rules, food, activities—that it literally rocks his world and what he has known so far.
Remember that a change in routine ALWAYS affects your child and his views of the world, how he can count on things and who he can hope to find consistency from.
SOOOOO, Remember, a change in sleeping patterns, yaya going on day off, new yaya, a death in the family, a trip of one parent w/o child, a loud sound, suddenly fighting pair of parents, etc. are examples of changes in the pattern the child has known so far. Since he can’t tell time, he relies on patterns. If you change this, he feels insecure of what he knows, who will be there for him to carry him or pick up after him when he is afraid of the near future. Who can he can now count on?
As a result of all these changes he is never prepared for, he becomes more clingy and fearful.
THESE ARE NORMAL. Tears from all sides are normal. Even mama will shed a tear when she sees her baby walking into school not “needing” her anymore. Even you as a parent getting all stressed with this new routine, before dropping him off in school is normal.
On the other hand, school and the new routine of waking up earlier isn’t normal, breakfast is hurried, you’re blabbering and worried about traffic (he doesn’t understand this but feels a difference in the air), he is now hurried to dress up, carry bags, you warn him not to hit people who are getting toys from him. What other new experiences and surprises await him outside the house?
He feels the stress emanating from you. He translates this to: If mommy isn’t happy, I’ve no reason to be happy and feel secure in this new environment. If she’s worried, I have reason to be too.
School is fun. It is meant to be fun. We owners spent and invested sooooo much to ensure it is the ultimate playground and learning center your child will want to not leave from even if you bribe him to! Then, after so much school-shopping, you found us and you liked our facilties, teachers, program and rates. You paid the tuition and came for the PTC.. Trust your gut! You made the decision to get your child some outside stimulation. Stand by it!
So dear Parent, #ginustomoto. Please wake up earlier, make waking up, breakfast, trip to school and leaving him there all pleasant experiences. Build us up. Show you’re in command of your feelings and of the drop off process.
Burn out happens to anyone and everyone who is overly STRESSED.
Kids who learn to trust their new school routine and depend on their teachers’s presence and attention (not yours) faster are those kids who are pleasantly left behind in school and picked up in school on time.
Crying kids still must go to school. Please don’t fall into their cute and charming trap. They’ll learn earlier that tears and you won’t solve their problems. ONLY THEY SHOULD.
Oh I have a lot to say on this topic! I’ll save them for another time 😀
CHECK MY BLOGS ON www.workshopsbyroxy.com and www.rosannearaneta.blogspot.com
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